McSkunkville Pest & Purity Co.
The No-Lice Guarantee — Keepers of the Clean Skunk Doctrine
Born: Founded the day the town charter was signed — cleanliness is clause one
Model: Civic Institution · fleet of mint-green vans · one of one
Role: Pest control for a town that refuses, on the record, to ever need it
Let the record reflect the Clean Skunk Doctrine, the proudest law in McSkunkville: there are no lice in this town. None. The Pest & Purity Company keeps it that way — mint-green vans, spotless uniforms, and a guarantee written in letters the size of your hand: MY SKUNKS DON'T EVER HAVE LICE.
Because here is what outsiders never understand about McSkunkvillians: there are no dirty skunks here. No stinky skunks. A Skunkian is of a different, unique nature — clean as a courtroom exhibit, groomed like a Sunday witness. The stripe gleams. The fur shines. The doctrine holds.
And the scent? A McSkunkvillian only stenches the stench when they choose to — deliberately, precisely, and only upon a deserving target. And when a Skunkian disappears, they take no scent with them. The scent collects with the target. That is not an odor; that is a verdict.
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© 2026 David McDermott · I AM THE LAW SKUNK™ · McSkunkville™ · All Rights Reserved. All characters, lore, artwork and games — Atticus Bradstreet McDermott™, Judge Brett David McSkunk™, David Bradstreet McSkunk™, Jim McSkunk Rockford™, Hugh "Le Pew" McSkunkner™, The Firm, the McSkunkville Casino™ and Series One: The Case of the McSkunk Ruby™ — are original works protected under 17 U.S.C. § 101 et seq. Unauthorized reproduction or commercial use is prohibited.Sealed in the Copyright Vault →